Sometimes I wonder if I am, in fact, a man, because every time an article like this rolls around I'm like the fuck I do.

Maybe because it's cheaper, easier and you're not judged by other person.

This thing has been trained on social media. Is that really wise?

Alternate title "Men so starved of sources of support they resort to talking to AI"

Edit: have started a new com for men to talk to each other instead of AI /c/reprieve@lemmy.zip

Better than nothing I guess. Obviously it's a privacy nightmare. But therapy is hard to reach nowadays and I've noticed that many men are reluctant to make that step. It'd be preferable if they did, but if ChatGPT can at least give an outlet for the emotions then it might just save a few people. Seeing men demolish themselves because they're too ashamed to seek help is something I've unfortunately seen quite often. Even though I'm aware of this I've still waited till it was way too late because I subconsciously didn't want to give in to the "weakness". I hate that men are conditioned this way, it costs lives.

And it's awesome. Men aren't allowed by others to show weakness. AI therapy genuinely helps a lot.

I mean, to a certain degree this is broadly true.

Like we have the numbers, younger generations are waaaay less likely to have had a relationship or sexual encounter by the same age/stage in their life as compared to previous generations, way more people just are relationship inexperienced.

This goes for both genders/sexes, though it is more prominent with younger men than women.

The overwhelming problem is that in the US, so much in person socialization is expensive, basically pay-gated, paywalled.

There are very few third places you can just hang out at for no cost. Public transit sucks or is non existant, cars are super unaffordable due to collapsing economy, and all our cities are designed for using cars to drive from place to place... so very few places are actually walk-navigable...

Everyone is increasingly overweight and overworked (or over homeworked, for students) and overstressed, so they can't or don't engage in group meet up hobbies or sports as much as they used to... and ironically even religiosity levels overall trending down means less people are going to church... all the traditional methods of getting socialization and expanding out a friend network in real life are withering.

So, the easier path is to get your socialization, of all kinds, primarily digitally.

But all those most common and popular ways of doing that are also massively manipulative with algos intentionally feeding you whatever ragebait slop appeals to you, personally.

It is very ironic that, as basically a 90s kid myself, very early tech adopter... my view of the vast majority of social media now is that it is basically a mentally harmful and addictive drug that people need to detox from... but when I tell younger people that, they say things like 'its not that deep bro, everybody has a (whatever) profile'.

There are lots of studies that show that very common levels of social media app usage... do actually reduce attention spans, spread dangerous misinformation, lower academic performance, cause negative self esteem by way of unrealistic standards, of beauty, lifestyle, wealth... brainrot is real, basically.

Like, I am all for the TikTok ban for kids. But also ban all short form video content for kids. Instagram, Youtube shorts, whatever.

This shit is melting peoples brains, it needs to be treated the same way you'd treat a drug epidemic.

We are now at the point where kids give so little of a fuck, have such tiny attention spans and need for constant, rapid fire stimulation... that half of adult Americans read below a 6th grade level, 20-30% of them read below a 2nd grade level, making them functionally illiterate... and thats just with Gen Z now mostly being in those young adult numbers, its gonna be even worse when Gen Alpha graduates and starts trying to enter society/the workforce.

EDIT:

This isn't even broadly unprecedented.

Look at Japan.

Hikkikomori.

The stagnant economy becomes overly financialized and corporatized and impossibly demanding... so people just drop out of it, or worse, kill themselves from the stress of trying to live up to its expectations...

And well then yeah, in person socializing broadly drops, relationship dynamics become strained and morph, birth rate plummets.

Give it 5 or 10 years and we'll have something resembling rent a boyfriend/girlfriend services and maid / stud cafes as well, as the stereotypified fascimile of socialization and having a real relstionship becomes a marketable product, and then industry.

Maybe a few areas will even properly legalize and regulate prostitution.

Granted, that'll be in any areas that remain even kind of blue.

The red areas will just go full theocrat and send you to jail for masturbating, but also re-legalize child marriage, and rework marriage laws into 'covenant marriage', where basically the woman functionally cannot divorce the husband.

In summary: cyberpunk hypercapitalism is in fact very very bad for healthy human relationship dynamics.

I mean, I know they fixed it, but LLMs once suggested jumping off a bridge if you searched for help with suicidal ideation

You get what you pay for. Would these same people take cancer treatments from the same LLM?

It's possible to reduce the privacy issues by using APIs with a local frontend. Given that APIs usually cater to companies instead of end consumers they actually have simple opt-outs for information logging.

Requires a bit of know-how, and you'll be paying for your llm per use (not that bad actually, I've personally averaged <10$/yr in api costs) but at least you get to have all your personal issues on your local device instead.

For a chatGPT-like experience you probably want the ooga booga web generation ui but there's others too.

Or it gets them into a negative feedback loop since AI hardly ever tries to contradict you.

But yeah. At least they're opening up to someone/something.

Or “men would rather talk to superpowered autocorrect rather than sharing their feelings with family and friends”

@gerryflap @bytesonbike

many men are reluctant to make that step

Sometimes it's not the patient to blame. I made the step, countless times since my childhood... I sought help... Result? Got several, diverging diagnostics, several medications that didn't work, until the most recent psychiatrist and psychologist some months ago: the psychiatrist said I got "nothing" (even when I had a fresh cut on my wrist) and the second "struggled to find any complaints from me". So I simply gave up on seeking medical care (and "care" in general, human or whatnot). I don't use AI for therapy because, as a former programmer, I'm deeply aware of their underlying Markov chain and NN algorithms, but sometimes their probabilistic outputs lead me to insights I couldn't get from any living Homo sapiens beings (such as the possibility that I have "Geschwind Syndrome", a condition of which will probably stay undiagnosed).

This response is why men feel scared and uncomfortable opening up. You are a part of the problem. For your male family members' sake, I hope you check in on them instead of just being sexist online.

Men feel scared and uncomfortable because they’re afraid to be told they were wrong to hide their feelings?

"Having trouble quitting heroin? A little bit of heroin can really alleviate those cravings!"

Have you ever considered not being like this?

If you really honestly don't understand why what you said was horrible I'm willing to have a conversation with you if you want to DM me to talk about it. For starters, men feel scared and uncomfortable because their serious problems will get made light of just like you did. Or told to "man up". Which I imagine was on the tip of your tongue

Have we considered this may be the only time it's actually justifiable to have real people controlling the "AI". Like instead of an underpaid tech worker from the global south answering coding questions, we get therapists to pretend to be AI so men will actually talk to them.

a terrible therapist at least has an ethics board

a terrible therapist at least has evidence-based interventions on their side

a terrible therapist at lest has the fact that ~80% of positive outcomes have nothing to do with the interventions or anything the therapist does besides show up and be cool (a statistic I remember quite well from grad school)

AI has none of these things

therapy isn't fucking magic. it's a relationship. you can't have a relationship with an LLM. there's no such thing as AI therapy, you're just training it to tell you about CBT worksheets while you bitch about your problems like you're in a nail salon