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Men are opening up about mental health to AI instead of humans

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  • Type anything to show you've never been to therapy: ^ this post

    Literally in therapy but okay. Continue to reject my perspective and unsupport a fellow dude. Hypocrites.

  • Literally in therapy but okay. Continue to reject my perspective and unsupport a fellow dude. Hypocrites.

    Who said I am a dude?

  • Yes they are. The genders are massivenly different in a lot of ways, and failure to acknowledge that is sexist.

    But keep screaming that anything that disagrees with your particular narrative that women are great and perpetual victims of men and men are always bad, I guess? Because that's not sexist, at all. lol

    it couldn't be that both men and women are people and both suffer from the same bullshit that they themselves perpetuate? nah.

    The genders are massivenly different in a lot of ways

    and even if you think that the psychology of genders isn’t different, society treats genders differently and this either from the therapist who reacts differently to different genders, or from the patient who expects difference the point is the same: the construct of gender forces artificial difference, even if it’s not based in real “our brains are the same” science (which they aren’t - same as our biology isn’t quite the same)

    equity is different to equality, and equity is actually what is needed

  • Again. Coping skills are not gender specific they're individual specific.

    Nobody is screaming. And yes women are victims of men, have you spoken to any of them about it? Because it's rather helpful to have those conversations.

    Your comment is just very one sided and that's the side that has the most power on the planet and as a member of that side I have just as much perspective of you and I'm here to say -- nah to most of what you said.

    Men's #1 issue is lack of empathy towards women, they isolate half the planet from supporting them. There's your solution.

    Your comment is just very one sided and that’s the side that has the most power on the planet and as a member of that side I have just as much perspective of you and I’m here to say – nah to most of what you said.

    The only 'side' that has power is the wealthy. But keep banging your gender war drum, it probably gives you meaning and purpose in life to collectively blame 'me'n for all the worlds ills as if anyone who has a penis or wants a penis is entirely the same.

    Drink that kool aid. yum yum. Donald Trump and his buddies thank you for your vote.

  • Well if you give up before you start just because the existing options are shitty then that makes you part of the problem, doesn't it?

    dude, you are the problem.

    that's what you refuse to acknowledge. the problem is people like you, claiming that it's not your problem, and those awful men looking for help and advice should just 'go away'. because they upset you.

    this is precisely how rich people feel about the homeless. 'just go away, we don't like you, but we refuse to help you and your very existence is an offensive to us.'

  • Naturally. We were beaten up and ostracized if we showed weakness when we were kids. You CAN'T be sharing your feelings like that to another human.

    You can share them to fellow humans here now /c/reprieve@lemmy.zip

  • If I thought I deserved to live

    But you do, everyone deserves to live.

    Nobody deserves this kind of pain

  • Nobody deserves this kind of pain

    Agreed. I'm just saying you deserve to live. Whether you do should be your choice, not your doctor's or your government's.

  • Cool, I'm glad you're so enlightened and open minded as to uh ... not give a fuck about perspectives from places you aren't from.

    As for you telling me how to use an internet message board... what more do you want from me?

    I told you where I am from and what I am talking about.

    I'd love to be able to move to Europe and get away from this fucking imploding hell hole of morons.

    But I am broke and physically disabled after being the victim of numerous physical assaults.

    Are any of ya'll accepting disabled American aslyum seekers, so we can easily enjoy your civilized world?

    Didn't think so.

    Focus on fixing your country and making it a decent place to live. That way you don't need to go anywhere. That's what we've been doing for decades, and it works.

  • because they're tired of being the entire support system for men experiencing a loneliness epidemic.

    I've got no horse in this race but it appears that 'men should not be afraid to open up' articles and tweets were followed by 'men, we are not your therapist'.

    🤷♂

    I'm a therapist who works almost exclusively with men. Here one pattern I've seen often:

    • Man is conditioned from a young age not to identify, process or express his feelings
    • Man doesn't share his feelings with anyone - friends, family, partners - for years
    • Man sees woman as safe, caring and validating
    • Man confides in woman only and continues not sharing feelings with others
    • Woman becomes overwhelmed, resentful, dismissive
    • Man gets the message that he never should have opened up in the first place

    It can be true both that men need to open up more and should not treat their partners as therapists. We all need support systems because no one person can always be available to give us everything we need. It's not wrong to confide in a partner, but if that partner is the only confidant it's precarious for both. And I want to emphasize this is not the fault of a man, or men as a community. This is the result of generations of conditioning from both men and women, and both men and women play a part in the solution. I also want to recognize that many of us don't have a network of people we could open up to even if we wanted to, and many more can't afford therapy.

    If anyone reading this can afford therapy, I highly recommend it. It's a place to undo some of that conditioning, to sit with someone who's committed to listening, caring, and not judging.

  • dude, you are the problem.

    that's what you refuse to acknowledge. the problem is people like you, claiming that it's not your problem, and those awful men looking for help and advice should just 'go away'. because they upset you.

    this is precisely how rich people feel about the homeless. 'just go away, we don't like you, but we refuse to help you and your very existence is an offensive to us.'

    Where is he saying it's not his problem? He's literally doing the exact opposite and making it his problem.

  • a lot of therapists and psychs are also useless for helping men. because they are women and they are basically only trained to deal with women's issues and only see women's emotional processes and processing as 'valid'. there is this default bias that men's emotional processing is 'flawed'.

    imo with mental health professionals all my 'issues' were blow way out of proportion. i only had one therapist who actaully helped me was a man and that person helped me understand that 'not everything is your fault'. when all the other therapists/friends/family always 100% told me everything that happens to me is entirely my fault. they also told me it was normal/healthy to vent my feelings by doing productive things (like writing, exercising, relaxing), rather than viewing that as 'not addressing the problem'.

    the issue with so much of this crap is that not only does nobody want to talk to men, it's that they don't want to listen and/or the tell us we are 'talking wrong'. even when we do talk to people, there is only a tiny window of acceptable things we an talk about and way we can talk about them or how selfish it is of him to vent/indulge his legitimate emotions.

    a woman can burst into tears over any little thing and everyone wants to help her. a man bursts into tears over his father dying of cancer and all the sudden everyone wants to tell him his reaction is too intense and he should be thinking of how he is making other people feel.

    Pretty much every guy has had someone in his life try to get him to 'open up' and then we he does he's met with nothing but hostility, disappointment, and eventually rejection. We are told to shut up and never talk about it again. Never, ever is he met with acceptance or love.

    Nonsense. The idea that all psychological issues are defined by gender is just the perspective of someone who's never made any meaningful progress through therapy and/or counseling. Mental health is not a gendered issue and the repetition of this misconception just leads more people to give up without even trying. Yes, the lens of sexual identity comes into play, mainly in terms of cultural gender roles experienced in your part of the world. But, a well trained, experienced therapist will have these considerations while exploring issues you present with. I would argue, that psychiatrists (which is an even moreso male dominated field) are much more of an issue, because their objective is not to help you come to conclusions about yourself. It is to medicate your symptoms away to allow you to function. I am sorry you did not have a good experience yourself, but that is not reflective of therapy, or counseling as a whole and your characterisation of men vs women in therapy is sexist and sounds more like male influencer talking points than lived experience.

  • I fail to see malicious sexism. Do you mind quoting them?

    i’d like to be very clear here… a lot of discussion about men’s spaces is thinly veiled sexism by incels… that doesn’t mean there’s not a problem, it just means that incels are attracted to “it’s not my fault”

    that said, there’s a comment up thread that captures it pretty well

    … mental health professionals all my 'issues' were blow way out of proportion … always 100% told me everything that happens to me is entirely my fault. they also told me it was normal/healthy to vent my feelings by doing productive things (like writing, exercising, relaxing), rather than viewing that as 'not addressing the problem'.

    the issue with so much of this crap is that not only does nobody want to talk to men, it's that they don't want to listen and/or the tell us we are 'talking wrong'. even when we do talk to people, there is only a tiny window of acceptable things we an talk about and way we can talk about them or how selfish it is of him to vent/indulge his legitimate emotions.

    … a man bursts into tears over his father dying of cancer and all the sudden everyone wants to tell him his reaction is too intense … someone in his life try to get him to 'open up' and then we he does he's met with nothing but hostility, disappointment, and eventually rejection

    it’s a meme (not in a “haha” joke way: in the actual meaning of the world; a thing that is repeated often) these days that there are horrible men who tell women (re sexism) “you must have misunderstood”… and the point of that is that men don’t have the life experience as a minority to be able to understand sexism, transphobia, etc (people treat them differently, and even if they see it they often can’t identify it because they’re not accustomed to listening for it 24/7)

    that same situation exists for men too… men are certainly not a minority, but nobody is allowed to say that someone’s experience is invalid… there’s a lot of people dismissing these experiences in this thread, and if it were reversed: a woman complaining about a man making a sexist comment, a gay man (of which i’m one) complaining about homophobia, there wouldn’t be any pushback at all because we’ve come to agree that this shit happens

    we know that toxic masculinity exists, we know that societal expectations of men are sky high (the suicide rate for men in particular is HUGE)… we’re clearly doing something wrong, as a society, dealing with male mental health… when people come out and tell us their experiences, it absolutely is sexist to write off those experiences as invalid: “i don’t think that kind of thing happens because i haven’t seen it”, is absolutely (anything)-ist language

    is it on the same level as problem as sexism or racism? probably not… but denying the problem helps nobody… denying the problem, in this case, makes the problem so much worse and pushes people to lash out and become sexist, racist, homophobic, etc (which is also not to remove blame from them - all those things are wrong and a personal choice and should have personal repercussions)

  • Yes they are. The genders are massivenly different in a lot of ways, and failure to acknowledge that is sexist.

    But keep screaming that anything that disagrees with your particular narrative that women are great and perpetual victims of men and men are always bad, I guess? Because that's not sexist, at all. lol

    it couldn't be that both men and women are people and both suffer from the same bullshit that they themselves perpetuate? nah.

    But keep screaming that anything that disagrees with your particular narrative that women are great and perpetual victims of men and men are always bad, I guess?

    Incel talk

  • Your comment is just very one sided and that’s the side that has the most power on the planet and as a member of that side I have just as much perspective of you and I’m here to say – nah to most of what you said.

    The only 'side' that has power is the wealthy. But keep banging your gender war drum, it probably gives you meaning and purpose in life to collectively blame 'me'n for all the worlds ills as if anyone who has a penis or wants a penis is entirely the same.

    Drink that kool aid. yum yum. Donald Trump and his buddies thank you for your vote.

    The only ‘side’ that has power is the wealthy.

    Pivot to wealth inequality because?

    But keep banging your gender war drum, it probably gives you meaning and purpose in life to collectively blame 'me’n for all the worlds ills as if anyone who has a penis or wants a penis is entirely the same.

    You are the one who made the issue about differences in sex and/or gender.

    No wonder you made no progress in therapy. You're completely obtuse.

    Also, no one is blaming men for their life's problems. That person, would need therapy. Also, please don't speak for men as a pejorative, your views are not reflective of any kind of monolith within my sex as a class of people and continually self-victimising under the guise of speaking for men's issues is disingenuous and pathetic.

  • Your comment is just very one sided and that’s the side that has the most power on the planet and as a member of that side I have just as much perspective of you and I’m here to say – nah to most of what you said.

    The only 'side' that has power is the wealthy. But keep banging your gender war drum, it probably gives you meaning and purpose in life to collectively blame 'me'n for all the worlds ills as if anyone who has a penis or wants a penis is entirely the same.

    Drink that kool aid. yum yum. Donald Trump and his buddies thank you for your vote.

    This is why you sucked in therapy and found it unhelpful. You're pissy, jaded and uncomfortable with the concept of being wrong. Classic men shit.

    Empathy would fix that, show that you don't have to be so insecure because nobody else is that secure.

  • i’d like to be very clear here… a lot of discussion about men’s spaces is thinly veiled sexism by incels… that doesn’t mean there’s not a problem, it just means that incels are attracted to “it’s not my fault”

    that said, there’s a comment up thread that captures it pretty well

    … mental health professionals all my 'issues' were blow way out of proportion … always 100% told me everything that happens to me is entirely my fault. they also told me it was normal/healthy to vent my feelings by doing productive things (like writing, exercising, relaxing), rather than viewing that as 'not addressing the problem'.

    the issue with so much of this crap is that not only does nobody want to talk to men, it's that they don't want to listen and/or the tell us we are 'talking wrong'. even when we do talk to people, there is only a tiny window of acceptable things we an talk about and way we can talk about them or how selfish it is of him to vent/indulge his legitimate emotions.

    … a man bursts into tears over his father dying of cancer and all the sudden everyone wants to tell him his reaction is too intense … someone in his life try to get him to 'open up' and then we he does he's met with nothing but hostility, disappointment, and eventually rejection

    it’s a meme (not in a “haha” joke way: in the actual meaning of the world; a thing that is repeated often) these days that there are horrible men who tell women (re sexism) “you must have misunderstood”… and the point of that is that men don’t have the life experience as a minority to be able to understand sexism, transphobia, etc (people treat them differently, and even if they see it they often can’t identify it because they’re not accustomed to listening for it 24/7)

    that same situation exists for men too… men are certainly not a minority, but nobody is allowed to say that someone’s experience is invalid… there’s a lot of people dismissing these experiences in this thread, and if it were reversed: a woman complaining about a man making a sexist comment, a gay man (of which i’m one) complaining about homophobia, there wouldn’t be any pushback at all because we’ve come to agree that this shit happens

    we know that toxic masculinity exists, we know that societal expectations of men are sky high (the suicide rate for men in particular is HUGE)… we’re clearly doing something wrong, as a society, dealing with male mental health… when people come out and tell us their experiences, it absolutely is sexist to write off those experiences as invalid: “i don’t think that kind of thing happens because i haven’t seen it”, is absolutely (anything)-ist language

    is it on the same level as problem as sexism or racism? probably not… but denying the problem helps nobody… denying the problem, in this case, makes the problem so much worse and pushes people to lash out and become sexist, racist, homophobic, etc (which is also not to remove blame from them - all those things are wrong and a personal choice and should have personal repercussions)

    I expected you to mean people exhibiting toxicity and not reporting about it. I was surprised because the comments seemed civil at large. Thank you.

  • What a clickbait. Of course people are picking feee resource with zero friction over 120$ an hour half a day event.

    in australia we have (limited) free mental health services (i wanna say 8 free sessions with a therapist?)… this still holds true

    it’s not only about money

  • Who said I am a dude?

    Dude is nongendered everyone is a dude, nice try tho trying to pull this though

  • in australia we have (limited) free mental health services (i wanna say 8 free sessions with a therapist?)… this still holds true

    it’s not only about money

    Another aussie here, Headspace is great too

  • No JS, No CSS, No HTML: online "clubs" celebrate plainer websites

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    R
    Gemini is just a web replacement protocol. With basic things we remember from olden days Web, but with everything non-essential removed, for a client to be doable in a couple of days. I have my own Gemini viewer, LOL. This for me seems a completely different application from torrents. I was dreaming for a thing similar to torrent trackers for aggregating storage and computation and indexing and search, with search and aggregation and other services' responses being structured and standardized, and cryptographic identities, and some kind of market services to sell and buy storage and computation in unified and pooled, but transparent way (scripted by buyer\seller), similar to MMORPG markets, with the representation (what is a siloed service in modern web) being on the client native application, and those services allowing to build any kind of client-server huge system on them, that being global. But that's more of a global Facebook\Usenet\whatever, a killer of platforms. Their infrastructure is internal, while their representation is public on the Internet. I want to make infrastructure public on the Internet, and representation client-side, sharing it for many kinds of applications. Adding another layer to the OSI model, so to say, between transport and application layer. For this application: I think you could have some kind of Kademlia-based p2p with groups voluntarily joined (involving very huge groups) where nodes store replicas of partitions of group common data based on their pseudo-random identifiers and/or some kind of ring built from those identifiers, to balance storage and resilience. If a group has a creator, then you can have replication factor propagated signed by them, and membership too signed by them. But if having a creator (even with cryptographically delegated decisions) and propagating changes by them is not ok, then maybe just using whole data hash, or it's bittorrent-like info tree hash, as namespace with peers freely joining it can do. Then it may be better to partition not by parts of the whole piece, but by info tree? I guess making it exactly bittorrent-like is not a good idea, rather some kind of block tree, like for a filesystem, and a separate piece of information to lookup which file is in which blocks. If we are doing directory structure. Then, with freely joining it, there's no need in any owners or replication factors, I guess just pseudorandom distribution of hashes will do, and each node storing first partitions closest to its hash. Now thinking about it, such a system would be not that different from bittorrent and can even be interoperable with it. There's the issue of updates, yes, hence I've started with groups having hierarchy of creators, who can make or accept those updates. Having that and the ability to gradually store one group's data to another group, it should be possible to do forks of a certain state. But that line of thought makes reusing bittorrent only possible for part of the system. The whole database is guaranteed to be more than a normal HDD (1 TB? I dunno). Absolutely guaranteed, no doubt at all. 1 TB (for example) would be someone's collection of favorite stuff, and not too rich one.
  • Firefox 140 Brings Tab Unload, Custom Search & New ESR

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    Read again. I quoted something along the lines of "just as much a development decision as a marketing one" and I said, it wasn't a development decision, so what's left? Firefox released just as frequently before, just that they didn’t increase the major version that often. This does not appear to be true. Why don't you take a look at the version history instead of some marketing blog post? https://www.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/releases/ Version 2 had 20 releases within 730 days, averaging one release every 36.5 days. Version 3 had 19 releases within 622 days, averaging 32.7 days per release. But these releases were unscheduled, so they were released when they were done. Now they are on a fixed 90-day schedule, no matter if anything worthwhile was complete or not, plus hotfix releases whenever they are necessary. That's not faster, but instead scheduled, and also they are incrementing the major version even if no major change was included. That's what the blog post was alluding to. In the before times, a major version number increase indicated major changes. Now it doesn't anymore, which means sysadmins still need to consider each release a major release, even if it doesn't contain major changes because it might contain them and the version name doesn't say anything about whether it does or not. It's nothing but a marketing change, moving from "version numbering means something" to "big number go up".
  • Pope Leo urges politicians to respond to challenges posed by AI

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    brewchin@lemmy.worldB
    Inevitable, really. And zero surprise it's coming out of China.
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    I have a perfectly fine moral framework According to what? Not everyone has the same beliefs and negative attitude toward it Not everyone thinks female circumcision is bad either. for some it can even have a positive impact. Lol I don’t believe in absolutist terms. Do you absolutely believe that? While your continued failure to comprehend my initial comment is astonishing Your initial comment is indicative of somebody who hasn't thought seriously about their worldview but feels confident about critiquing others.
  • Russian Lawmakers Authorize Creation Of National Messaging Service

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    Are there substantial numbers of Russians who seriously wouldn't be wise to this?
  • lemm.ee is shutting down at the end of this month

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    vopyr@lemmy.worldV
    If I know correctly, it is not possible to export posts, comments, replies.