i self host matrix and some other docker runs the voice for it, so it is there if you got a server. which i mean, not everybody does so that sucks. it was a bit of a pain but im not the best at server stuff

Seems like you have to keep something running for it to work. Some obscure service relied on it as a support channel and last thing I remember is that matrix server stopped working. Though it would help so much if it would be p2p.

Yeah, my primary concern is I'm part of a community of ~350 people who games together, and while there's probably some folks in there who could swing a server, right now discord isn't costing us anything and does everything we want (chat, voice, streaming, etc). If we were to consider moving we would probably need a reasonably beefy server and some software with all of those features, and right now that just doesn't seem feasible.

This is outdated and no longer preferred, it now has its own internal system called Element Call (aka an implementation of MatrixRTC).

"something running" - do you mean the server binary? Because, yes, if you're using your own server you do need it to be running. Same for the client, I guess? I guess I don't really understand what you meant by that.

Some obscure service relied on it as a support channel and last thing I remember is that matrix server stopped working.

That's an issue with any federated service, yeah. If the server is down, it's down. But as a bonus, unlike Discord, when a server is down you can just move to another. So, honestly, I see that as a boon.

As far as p2p goes, there was an effort to make that a while back, but it looks like people lost interest.

Though, personally I think federation is good enough. That's why I'm on Lemmy/the Fediverse, after all.

increasingly belligerent chasing of profits.

The word you're looking for is enshittification.

I only mean that the requirements are high enough for someone to stop using it at some point, losing users of that server in the process. It might be different if it didn't require running a server. Or they could choose to host their rooms on some existing server, I guess.

i use coturn for voice on mine

I thought it was called capitalism.

Users on reddit and lemmy always seem to think ad-based stuff is going to fail, and then it turns out people in the real world are depressingly accepting of ads. I would bet that this program is more likely to be expanded than canceled.

how good of an alternative is matrix to discord?

Not as feature rich, quite buggy, inherently more private but also less usable.

The above compounds when trying to get the non-techies to use it, because sometimes it doesn’t just work

How in the hell has that app gone so far down? This must be a record in enshittification.

I thought it was called capitalism.

Because of the networking effect, people don’t leave.

Federation is strong specifically because of how it gets around the networking effect. You don't need a .world account to see content from it. That doesn't apply for Twitter, Facebook, and YouTube without shenanigans.

This notion that everyone’s just going to pick up and leave Lemmy

You don't need to leave lemmy. It takes 10 minutes to set up a new account somewhere else, with zero downsides.

Only option available is Matrix. It has its problems, but they're being worked on.

Right now it lacks the gaming/voice chat parts of discord - so for an OSS alternative for that part of discord specifically, there's Mumble.

For everything else, Matrix is a good alternative. Just be sure to pick a discord-like client. (E.g. Commet or Cinny)