Let Apple additionally throw some underage girls for him to rape so the deal lasts.

Since when did the word “statue” now also mean “trophy” and/or “award”?

I'm also confused like you. Looking at the pictures in the article and the others at The Verge it appears to be a trophy or award like you get for employee of the year not a "statue".

That's one of the nicer participation trophies I've seen

On the face of it, this falls foul of numerous anti-bribery laws and regulations of the sort employees of companies such as Apple are required to do tests on annually. (If you ever so much as worked as a mail clerk at a large company, you will have clicked through multiple-choice tests driving home that, should you somehow find yourself in a position of trading a bottle of champagne or some Superbowl tickets for a multi-million-dollar contract in some exotic foreign land, that sort of thing is absolutely not on, and will cost you your job if not federal prison time.)

On the other hand, those rules were drafted back when America saw itself as qualitatively above the sordid corruption that less fortunate nations were mired in. Those days are as far gone as the drag clubs of Weimar Berlin.

Yeah.

It fucken worked, didn't it?

Commemorative disk?

Keep buying your Apple products, guys.

Just for this everyone should reconsider buying any Apple products. Tim Apple is such a disgusting and nasty person, and then he started licking the predators ass. Fuck him and fuck American companies.

It's like when I want to get my cats in from outside. They don't want to come in of course so I have to shake the bag of treats, when they come in they give them like five even though clearly they would like the entire packet.

They never learn.

This would be a great idea if literally any other tech company were even slightly above such behavior. This is just what Capitalism is all about, baby. Corruption. Get used to it, because this isn't changing until Americans revolt (culturally, violently, politically, economically? who knows) and that likely isn't happening with this complacent and socially isolated of a populace

I personally vote for CEOs publicly embarrassing themselves in more and more degrading ways.

A few nice words and a $15 shiny object is all you need to curry favour with the current President.

Can someone ask him for free college education and healthcare in America, presenting him a golden stethoscope or golden book-shaped award?

Hey, uh, what the fuck? Why the fuck are companies giving the President of the United States Golden statues like he's some sort of Middle Eastern Dictator?

Because he might not be "Middle Eastern" or "Dictator" but he behaves exactly like "some sort of Middle Eastern Dictator".

To ask for "favors" later. Clearly money sways him, he's imposing tariffs on Brazil because "they've never been good to us", meaning "they don't give USA enough money". It's all about money and how he can get it into him and his pedo friends pockets.

Look at the plane he got, supposedly he's taking it with him after office? I wish he'd just spontaneously explode during a meeting with his pedo buddies, taking them out too. Or on the plane and take them all out over the Pacific.

Absolutely pathetic Tim. Pathetic.

The rules only apply to low paid employees. You bet your ass a regular federal employee could still be fired for receiving a free lunch.

Ey, relax guy!

Not stupid if it works. Something else is.